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Jokes Top 100 | Part 2

Best first: A glass of Nutella has about 9870 calories. But I don’t care. I never eat the glass anyway.
Fun - Old man laughing about a joke

11

Police officer: "Can you identify yourself, sir?"
 
Driver pulls out his mirror and says: "Yes, it's me."


12

Some nice Chinese couple gave me a very good camera down by the Washington Monument. I didn’t really understand what they were saying, but it was very nice of them.
13

What do you get when you cross-breed a cow and a shark?
 
I don’t know, but I wouldn't enjoy milking it.
14

Dentist: "You need a crown."
-
Patient: "Finally someone who understands me"
15

Two flies are sitting on a pile of dog poop. One suggests to the other: “Do you want to hear a really good joke?”

The other fly replies: “But nothing disgusting like last time, I’m trying to eat here!”


16
 
Coco Chanel once said that you should put perfume on places where you want to be kissed by a man. But hell does that burn!

17

A wife goes to consult a psychiatrist about her husband: “My husband is acting so weird. He drinks his morning coffee and then he goes and eats the mug! He only leaves the handle!”
 
Psychiatrist: “Yes, that is weird. The handle is the best part.“
18
 
I heard women love a man in uniform. Can’t wait to start working at McDonalds.
19

Oh darling, since you’ve started dieting, you’ve become such a passionate kisser…

What do you mean, passionate? I’m looking for food remains!


Next Part
Funniest jokes of all times

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10

See also: New jokes

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