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Dad Jokes | Father Jokes

Best first: “Did you get a new haircut dad?” “No, I had them all cut, son.”
    
 Funny Dad jokes

Good Old Dad Jokes

 
Son: "Is this insecticide good for mosquitos?"

Dad: "Not at all, it kills them!"

“I’ll call you later!”
-
“Please don’t do that. I’ve always asked you to call me Dad!”
Did you hear the joke about the elephant in the elevator? No? Me neither, I took the stairs.
Dad to his son: "I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and dumb.
"Daughter to her dad: "What is it?"
-
Dad: “It” is a pronoun.
You: “So, dad, I was thinking…”

Dad: “Ohhhhh and I wondered what that high-pitched grinding sound was!”

Would you like to hear a construction joke?
 
Well I’m still working on it.
"We drove past a city cemetery and my dad remarked, “Do you know why I can’t be buried here, boy?”

“Why?”

“Because I’m still alive.”
Dad: I have a very secure job. There’s nobody else who would want it.
Dad, I’m hungry!”

“Oh hello Hungry, I’m Dad!”

“But I’m really hungry!”

“And I’m really Dad.”
Daughter: “How do I look, daddy?!”
 
Dad: “With your eyes, sweetheart.”
Yo Dad, what’s up?
-
The ceiling.
Dad, I’m cold!

Go to the corner, son, there’s 90 degrees.

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Stop whining, you will never be the man your mother is.
Father: Do you know the joke from the 3rd floor?
-
Son: “No,”
-
Father: Me neither, I was on the 2nd floor at the time.
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of Dad Jokes

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5



 
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