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Blonde Jokes | Part 5 *
(for academic purposes only)
 


     
A boss says to a blonde waitress, "Could you please fill up the salt dispenser?"
An hour later she's still at it, so he asks, "What happened, why is it taking so long?"
She whips back, "Do you know how hard it is to get the salt through the little holes?!"
Why aren't there any blonde lift girls? - They had big problems with the route directions.
Why do blondes only shoplift in Walmart?
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Because there are always lower prices.
Q: How many blondes do you need to change a light bulb?
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A: Two. One holds the Diet Pepsi, and the other one calls, "Daaady!"
Q: What do you get when you give a blonde girl a penny for her thoughts?
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A: Change.
Why is it more convenient to park with a blonde in the car?
 
You can park in a disabled place.
What do you call a blonde who dyed her hair black?
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Artificial intelligence.
"How come your blond girlfriend never smiles?"
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"Because I told her once that I want a serious relationship and not just fooling around."
Q: Why did the blonde buy an elephant instead of a new car?
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A: She heard the elephant has a bigger trunk.
Q: What do you call a blonde girl standing between two guys?
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A: A mental block.
“I got a nice compliment on my driving today”, a blonde brags to her friend. “There was a note left on my windshield and it said “parking fine”.
Why is it difficult for blonde girls to write the number 11?
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They never know which of the 1s comes first.
Why is it a bad idea to let a blonde girl skydive when she's on her period?
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She always pulls the wrong string.
Q: What do you call a blonde who has half a brain?
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A: Gifted!
Q: What would you call a clever blonde?
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A: A golden retriever.
Little Johnny asks his blonde mum: "Do you believe there is life on the moon?"
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"Of course, look, they have the lights on."
A blonde in a miniskirt tells her friend, "A guy made me an offer today. He said he'll give me $30 if I make a handstand. So I did, of course."
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Her friend replies, "Come on, he just wanted to see your panties."
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The blonde girl replies, "Hey I'm not that stupid. I took them off before!"
Next Part
of Blonde Jokes

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

* A small note on usage: It is NOT OK to use blonde jokes, even though they're really funny, to make actual living, breathing people feel crap. It's a game that nobody wins, and even though people may laugh with you at the time, no-one's ever gotten any friends worth the word this way.
 
Everything you send out will have an influence on you, so better send out something positive. And while you're at it, enjoy these horribly mean and ridiculously funny jokes, for academic purposes!


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